My human side

Today is debtor's day. This means I get to phone all those people that have amounts outstanding on their accounts - mostly those that are sitting in 90 days or more. It's not really the most pleasant of jobs, but people usually don't argue and promise to pay as soon as possible. Two of the phone calls I made today really affected me. Maybe more than they should have.

I phoned one lady who is a nurse, a widow (thus a single mom) and only earns between R 2500 and R 5000 a month. Her account is in 90 days by about R 850. I tried to get hold of her last week, but could only get through to her daughter, who promised to tell her about it. When I phoned today, she was audibly shocked. She had completely forgotten about the account. She kept on mumbling "Oh my gosh", and "Where am I going to get the money from?". She wanted to know if she can pay in installments. I literally winced when I had to tell her that she has no choice but to pay the full amount, as it is in 90 days already. She asked me, so helplessly, what I wanted her to do now. I could only say "Pay the money as soon as possible". I thought she might start crying. I so badly wanted to say "Don't worry! Just pay what you can and when you can."
But it's not me she owes the money, but the company. And the company doesn't care if you're a widow and a nurse and only earn pittance every month. I really felt like I was being cruel and cold. But this is my job.

And then I phoned a library who had not payed their account. The phone was answered by a lady with a rather timid voice. Now that I think about it, she was probably just really upset. I asked for the contact-person who pays the account. The lady on the other end said: "She's not in today". So I asked for a cell phone number. "I'm... I'm afraid the person you are looking for has passed away." She sounded so fragile and hurt and like she was suffering terribly. I didn't know what to say. I heard myself forcing out a "Sorry" and ending the call. I felt like such a dog. Here I was, all I'm supposed to care about is getting money out of these people, without giving a thought to what they might be going through. But I felt myself feeling sad and really sorry for the nameless woman on the other end. I had to gather myself for a few minutes before calling back and asking about the outstanding payments.

I sometimes feel like I live in a bubble. Then again, you just cannot be aware of the hundreds of tragic things going on around you - you would exhaust yourself emotionally in one single day. But surely I should be a little more empathic with those that cross my path. Too bad its not in my job description.